Thursday. Doubts started creeping into my mind. What if I haven’t done what I am supposed to do? What will God tell me when I die? Have I really fulfilled my mission or just walked with fear hand in hand? In view of the deadly earthquake and tsunami in Japan, I cannot help but ask these questions of myself because ultimately everyone will die. It is just that nowadays, it seems like Death is calling by hundreds and thousands. People are being sent on an uneasy expedition never to return again just like matches are packed on boxes with their sparks never to be ignited.
I am sure, somehow at some point in time you have asked yourself the above questions. But if you are like me, you will also have a rational explanation (and excuse at times). For example, you say something like this. “But Lord, I can’t do what I really, really want to do because I have five children to feed. I work six days a week plus overtime. I clean the house M W F and do the laundry T Th S, and my husband got sick over the weekend, and I only get four hours of sleep each night. How am I supposed to do your will and also do what I’ve been wanting to do in order to serve You? And the list goes on and on.
The Lord answered me in the silence of my heart. “You are doing what you are supposed to do. Calm done.” I heard it, and later forgot about it.
Friday. I came across two types of individuals—one who showed little concern about her child’s progress and another who exhibited too high expectations from his child. For some reason, I didn’t know how it happened but I felt I was exactly at the right place at the right time addressing these issues. At the time that these things were unraveling, it dawned on me that only God can lead me into these situations. It was like they were orchestrated to happen.
So, to go back to the question of “How am I doing Lord? Am I doing your will?” The answer is yes we are. The Lord understands our weaknesses and constraints. He understands when we are doing our best serving Him despite our hectic lifestyles. The best way to state it that comes to my mind is “Bloom where you are planted.”
Friday afternoon I felt calm and comforted knowing God threw an answer to my question. I hope whoever is reading this can also relate to my situation and find comfort that God understands our every question and need. To end, I looked at some bible verses and I was drawn to this one: “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
